Beneath The Lies
by Hanae da Firefly
Summary: Sometimes, you can’t help but wonder if any of this is for real. You can’t help but wish that you could escape from a bitter reality and hide away in your own fantasies forever and ever. Can you remember those watercolour days?...


**A/N:** Hey there, people. I'm writing this ficlet because I'm feeling perverse and felt like it. Okay. Enjoy.

**  
Beneath The Lies**

_Sometimes, you can't help but wonder if any of this is for real.  
You can't help but wish that you could escape from a bitter reality and hide away in your own fantasies forever and ever.  
Can you remember those watercolour days?  
When you were still young, naïve; careless about the affairs of the world.  
And then, something happened to you, and those bright paints that coloured your life smeared with a deep shade of red that you hated so much.  
And you wish above all things, that all you were living was a lie. . ._

**_Hanae da Firefly_**

* * *

"Goku? You were saying something?" asked Hakkai gently. The young boy snapped out of his musings and said, "Ah, no. It's nothing." Hakkai smiled and nodded in understanding as he went to the other side of the brightly lit room. Goku looked out of the window. The smell of fresh lavender that the innkeeper's daughter had placed inside the room was letting him daydream to many years before. The fragrance pervaded his senses as he vaguely remembered a familiar sense of déjà vu.

* * *

Sanzo closed his eyes. It had been 18 hours. . . 18 hours since he last had a minute of peace. His mood was getting lighter as that one-minute blossomed into 3 hours of silence. He smoked his cigarettes attentively, occasionally looking at the crater beneath the valley through the window of his room. The town was an ideal place to enjoy a pension, save the temple and those bald monks who kept bugging him to preach (he was only 20 dammit). He'd have to note the location when he retired.

"Sanzo?"

Without turning to look at the owner of the voice, he puffed in some more nicotine. "What d'you want, Goku?" He didn't hear footsteps and could sense some small 'Erm. . .'s and 'Ah. . .'s so he looked Goku in order to fast-forward the scene (to get back to his meeting with silence and privacy).

And bloody hell, he used up most of his energy convincing himself that the scene he was looking at was NOT, in more ways than one, _cute_.

Goku was looking up at him, hair ruffled adorably and looking wide-eyed and innocent at him. "Sanzo, why do you hate the rain?" The guardian raised an eyebrow. "Because, monkey-boy, the rain isn't something worth welcoming. It delays your business and makes you wet, cold and sick."

"So. . if it's not raining, you would be happy, right?"

"Happy-_er_"

Sanzo smirked as he recalled the exact same conversation 6 years ago. Goku looking exactly the same then as he was now.

"So, are you happy now?"

Sanzo frowned. He was starting to get irritated by the monkey's persistence.

"What's this gotta do with anything?" he asked, not hiding his annoyance.

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

_"Master? Is it alright for you to skip your sermons like this?" asked the young apprentice. Koumyo Sanzo merely chuckled and said, "I'm going to teach you something new today, Kouryuu."_

_"Teach me something new?"_

_"Yes. I wonder if you've heard of something called 'watercolour' before". . . _

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

"Ah, so, let me get this straight. He came up to you, asking if you were feeling happy or not--"

"Interruptting my PEACE, smiley man"

"Ah, right, that. Anyways, he asks you if you were happy in order to ask you a question--"

"Not only does he INTERRUPT my peace, the fucking quest-"

"Shaddap Sanzo. Get on with it, Hakkai"

"Yes, before I was interrupted"

Pause. Smile.

"To ask you about orgasms?"

"FUCKING NO! THAT WAS DAY BEFORE YESTERDAY ASSHOLE!!!"

"Oh, little Goku all grown up. . ."

"Fuck you, Gojyo. He's fifteen. _FIFTEEN_. Fifteen year olds aren't SUPPOSED to act like idiot monkeys"

"Calm down now, the both of you. So, he asked you about condoms?"

"What the-! You IDIOT Hakkai! That was LAST WEEK"

"I knew I should'a let him read my _Playboy_s"

"Sprite, you let him any inch NEAR your fat ass cargo and fat piece'a body mass, I swear I'll put a bloody hole through that fucking empty space in between your ears and-!"

"_Children_"

Twitch. Silence.

"Good. Now, what help did you need again? I won't bother re-guessing the question"

"The bloody monkey's been acting like a little kid!"

"He's been noisier than usual?"

"No"

"Lad's been un-hungry?"

"Is there _really_ nothing between those sorry ass ears of yours?"

"You want a piece'a me?! Short ass, droopy-eyed-"

"_AHEM_"

Twitch. Twitch. Silence. Twitch.

"And how odd has his behaviour been?"

"He's still noisy. He still cleans a restaurant with that bottomless pit of his"

"Sounds like your normal monkey boy"

"Sanzo?"

"That's it. I'm getting pissed. He just acts so cuddly-cuddly innocent I wanna blow his brains off"

"And his eyes seem a bit too emotional?"

"And he seems like a blank idiot?"

"You morons KNOW about it?!"

"Like 'yah'. He's been like that since you came back"

"It seems he's gotten a little upset when he saw some small birds that were roasted on sticks yesterday"

"Fuck it. What does that mean?"

"Ah? The _Almighty_ _Master _Sanzo knows nothing about his young pet monkey?"

"Oh fuck you, Gojyo"

"But there must be a way to fix this. You should try comforting him, Sanzo. Maybe you scolded him excessively?"

"What the fuck?!!"

"Or maybe the lad's just lookin' for some ass. He's fifteen, man. _Fif-teen_"

"Screw you, Gojyo"

"Then what do YOU suggest mister-wheeny-whiny-monk-boy?!!"

Sanzo paused a moment, glaring spitefully at everything in sight.

_Fuck it. I hate doing this._

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

"Huh?"

The young boy looked up at his guardian. "Well? Are you coming or not?!" demanded Sanzo, shifting his weight onto his left foot. "What about your temple sermons?" asked the boy. "_Oy_. Get off that ass of yours and MOVE," he said with such fang that Goku gave a yelp and fell off the bed he was sitting upon.

About ten minutes later, Goku was following Sanzo out in the sunshine. "Wah. . . this town smells so nice!" Sanzo rummaged through his sleeve for a pack of cigarettes. "You hungry?" Goku shook his head. "I mean, the smell is nice, not aromatic. But, yeah! I want some pau!" he said cheerily.

Sanzo simply ignored this innocent request and continued making his way through the town. "Sanzooo Where are we going? I'm huuuungry. . ." whined the young fifteen year old.

Finally, they reached the top of the hill. Goku's whining and panting began to decrease as he reveled in the splendour of the scenery. The air was fresh and the hike up did good for their inactive bodies.

"What did you bring me up here for again?"

Sanzo looked around to make sure he wasn't being watched. "This"

Goku looked at what was in Sanzo's hand.

"This is called 'watercolour', Goku"

"Why did you bring this paint set up here?"

Sanzo suppressed a stray vein and inhaled deeply.

"I'm going to show you how to paint, monkey"

With that, it became silent as Sanzo strategically stroked the colours onto the papers that he brought along. They weren't much but Goku simply enjoyed the way his keeper managed to convey the serenity of the mountain with the gentle colours.

He learned quickly the art of painting with simple watercolour paints and picked up some useful techniques as he observed Sanzo. He drifted off into his own world as earthly colours splashed onto his paper.

Sanzo was probably glad that Goku was making himself busy. His eyes were closed and his mind too wafted away with the breeze. . .

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

_"Kouryuu, do you know why it's always a good idea to paint in the midst of mountains and trees?"_

_"Because it conveys the bounty of mother nature?"_

_"My boy, weren't you an unbeliever of god?" _

_"Yes, master. I do not believe"_

_"Actually, it is the mere fact that we are away from people and the company that make our lives hectic. Peace and calmness are a rare essence that each human need to acquire to fully relax"_

_"Peace and calmness?"_

_"You may not think much of it now, but in time, you will come to see the joys of quiet, alone and privacy"_

_"Ah!"_

_"My, my. You've spilled the red paint. However, it does beautifully accent the colour of the moor"_

_". . . . .it"_

_"Pardon? I couldn't catch that"_

_". . . . I hate the colour. Let me redo it"_

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

_But isn't it tough enough as it is with this boy hating to be alone?_

Sanzo looked carefully at his charge and smirked.

_It may be, but I still have to show him how to make a paper plane._

"Because," he muttered audibly without knowing, as Goku was able to hear him, "we're all gonna die anyway"

* * *

_And beneath all these lies. . . only one truth remains. . . ._

"We're all gonna die anyway"

* * *

**A/N:** I hope y'all liked it. Spent most of my breaks on the PC writing it. If anyone wants to use any of my poems or parts of the narration of any of my fics as quotes, feel free to drop me a line. Plus I made a wallpaper to this fic. If anyone wants a peek at it, drop me another line and I'll e-mail it to ya. ;) 


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